God designed us to be relational. (Read that again and let it sink in before your continue.) God designed us to be relational.
Webster’s defines “relational” in three ways:
- An aspect or quality (as resemblance or causality) that connects two or more things or parts as being or belonging or working together, as being of the same kind, or as being logically connected.
- The attitude or stance which two or more persons or groups assume toward one another.
- The state of being mutually or reciprocally interested.
I
agree that all three of these definitions fit what Christ was saying here in
Matthew. With this in mind I would go further to say that God created us to be
relational.
First: with Him, the Trinity, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, this
being the most important relationship anyone can have, this relationship is
vital to our very lives.
Second: to be relational with our spouse, the second most important relationship is
between a man and woman, a husband and wife, the first institution God created
was this union (relationship) between a man and woman.
Third: is the relationship we have with our offspring, our children their children and
if blessed with their children, we are to be their provider, protector and
their teacher especially where God is concerned.
Fourth: our relationship with the church, the very body of Christ, this is the
relationship(s) that will feed us spiritually and socially, these are the
people that God wants us to align with, the people who live, eat, breath and
live the very Word of God. These are the people we invest in, the people we
break bread with, we expose who we are and trust that they will love us and
protect us as well as set us straight when we go astray.
Fifth: our relationship with the world, this is also important, as we are to be the
living Word of God to the world, Jesus commanded us to take the Good News to
the world: “and this Good News about the Kingdom will be preached through all
the world for a witness to all people; and then the end will come.” (Matthew
24:14, GNT) We must also remember that while we are in this world and the
relationships we develop with people in this world are important we are not to
be a part of this world, read what Jesus says to His Father about the dangers
we face. “I gave them your message, and the world hated them, because they do
not belong to the world, just as I do not belong to the world. I do not
ask you to take them out of the world, but I do ask you to keep them safe from
the Evil One.” (John 17:14-15, GNT) You see as much as we desire to partake of
the worldly desires, to partake of the fleshly pleasures, whether that is
money, power, sex, any of the things that brings pleasure to the flesh. We must
resist the ideas and desires of this world and take up the ideas and desires of
our Savior, Jesus Christ.
You
see we have many relationships that we must maintain, and we are designed to be
relational seems to be an exhausting proposition. Being in relationship for any
extended period is one of the hardest things to live. However, relational preservation
is vital for the long-haul effectiveness for two or more people growing and
maintaining a long-term relationship. We cannot ignore relational needs any
more than we can ignore the ongoing maintenance of a piece of the family car. Our
relationships, like our cars, will break down if we are not careful to maintain
them. They will become worn-out from use and overuse over a long period. That
is why healthy relationships pay attention to the quality of their time
together. Independent humans learn, by grace, to co-exist, to live in harmony
and if truly blessed at times live in sync with one another.
Unfortunately,
it is usually required that a relationship needs some repair and/or
restoration. Whether it is a harsh word, a forgotten promise or important date,
many things in a relationship can and will result in a hurting heart. Feelings
of disappointment, dejection, dissatisfaction, even rejection may creep in and
begin to stew. When we introduced dishonesty into relationships distrust and
withholding emotional support soon follows which causes insecurity and even
fear. Developing, growing relationships manifest in our hearts not just on a
mental level, with casual exchanges of information. The more we mature in our relationships
we develop an ability to distinguish between behavior that is minor or major, just
a one time act or something that happens time and time again, we are able to
understand if something was on purpose or a slip. We try to talk about
something that is upsetting us before we become preoccupied over emotions that
may be unwarranted.
“Love
is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of
wrongs;” (1 Corinthians 13:5, GNT) Jesus in His usual loving way is telling us
that before we give of ourselves to Him we are to give a heartfelt confession,
atone for our transgressions, beg for forgiveness. It is far more important to
Christ that we fix our relationships with one another than anything we have to
offer Him. If we truly love God if we truly fear our Creator in our hearts, He
will revel to us with whom and where we need to fix our relationships. Those we
have wronged may not be quick to reconcile it may take a long time for someone
to forgive us, some of our transgressions cut deep into others hearts, however
we must listen to the Holy Spirit and trust in His work that the others heart
may be restored. Yes, we even have to approach the hard ones, the ones that cut
the deepest, the ones that cause us to tremble within; these are the most
important ones that we must involve ourselves. Remember we are designed to be
relational and sometimes that is a tough road to walk over.
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